So, my beautiful fat girlfriend, Cassidy, is threatening to kick me to the curb again, my best friend suddenly wants to put the brakes on our lives of fabulous fun, my mom and big sister are plotting a future in which I turn into an atomic vampire, and my dad, well, my dad is a big fat question mark that I’m not sure I want the answer to.

Some people would let a senior year like this get them down. Not me. I’m Sutter Keely, master of the party. I’m your man when it comes to cranking the wild times. But don’t mistake a midnight philosopher like me for nothing more than a shallow party boy. Just ask Aimee, the new girl in my life.

She saw the depth of the Sutterman from that first moment when she found me passed out on the front lawn. Okay, so she’s a social disaster; but that’s where I come in. Isn’t it my duty to show her a splendiferous time, and then let her go forth and prosper?

Yes, life is weird, but I embrace the weird. Let everyone else go marching off into their great shining futures if they want. Me, I’ve always been more than content to tip my whiskey bottle and take a ride straight into the heart of the spectacular now.